She’s short, she’s sweet and she’s just waiting to be read! Enjoy x
- Meal prepping
Who actually has time to cook a million portions of the same thing and put it into 20 tupperware containers? Not to mention fridge space. Not a chance you’ll catch me doing this.
- Updating my computer
Honestly Apple, when I say remind me tomorrow – what I really mean is go away, I don’t know my Apple ID password and would rather continue watching Girlboss than restart my laptop right now. Soz.
- The 3-5 business days between paying for makeup and receiving said makeup
When I order makeup, I want it now. I wanna look contoured and highlighted the second I decide I need another glow kit. Same goes for clothes really, but does anyone get insanely impatient when awaiting a parcel?
- Taking my car wardrobe and reuniting it with my bedroom wardrobe
Who doesn’t have a spare 4 pairs of shoes rolling about in the back of their car? Options, people.
- Fake tanning
I was born pale and will die pale. I will also accept every “if you’re Indian, why are you white?” comment just so I can avoid floating around the house waiting for fake tan to dry.
- Making my own pesto
“MUM, IM GOING VEGAN AND WILL NOT MISS ANY FOOD AT ALL I LUV THE ANIMALS” Still true, but goddamn pesto if only you didn’t require using and therefore washing the food processor. I will eat you in my next life.
- Updating my CV
Can’t you just give me a job? If I scan my transcript to you is that all good? CBF actually writing a CV.
- Checking to see if everything has milk in it
I give up. Why does everything have milk in it???? GARLIC PASTE? Milk solids you have no place here.
- Moderating my spam comment queue
If you’ve sent me a lovely comment, and I’ve not replied – chances are it’s in my long ass list of spam comments waiting to get moderated. There is only so many times I can delete viagra related comments before I decide to put that on the ‘deal with never’ shelf.
- Asking the waiter for the vegan options
Why you gotta roll your eyes dude? Smash me some avo and put it on some toast and I won’t mention it again. Maybe.
Love, Lyd x